"I say, am I supposed to spend the whole day wallowing around in my own feces? A little service here."

"Hello mother. Care to partake in one of your oh so exhilarating games of peekaboo?"

"Yes, but no sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you."

Yes, Stewie is the best character on family guy (this is an impromtu to shout out!!)